best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize