community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
