I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I want to fling myself into the sun
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
