This is not my ceiling
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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