I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
