I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
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