Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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