even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
