Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
