just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
