i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
