Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
