Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
