bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
