We won't sleep together?
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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