I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I said "one day" and that day is not today
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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