I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
