Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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