Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
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