you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
