yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize