Betty ford says i'm here all night
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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