feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
