I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Im just a social blackout drinker.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
