I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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