Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Randomize