she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
