Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize