Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
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