i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize