Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
