Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
