I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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