he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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