his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
