eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
