i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
We need to get me chipped asap
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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