C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
17 year olds will be the death of me.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
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