Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
