Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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