I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
