Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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