Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Randomize
