it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Randomize
