Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
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