He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Randomize