I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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