I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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