piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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