woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
