Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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